And they said the housing market was dead...

Edward Marchion won this foreclosure auction back in June. The standard rules applied: No interior inspections allowed. Bidders could admire the exterior all they wanted — maybe peek through a window with some binoculars — but walking through the front door? Nah, that comes after you drop $82,000 down and sign on the dotted line.

But what did the family find when they showed up to their new 2,800-square-foot property situated on two acres?

And when Marchion entered for the first time — after placing a winning $525,000 bid for the $650,000-valued home — he found three dead bodies inside ...

The skeletal remains, for the two bodies that have been identified, are those of Sally Anne Cash, who would have turned 54 on Monday, and her son Brian, who would have turned 23 this month. The third body remains under DNA testing for identification; Cash bought the Cape Cod-style residence in 2019 with her husband, Paul.

I've seen this movie way too many times, and the Marchion family needs to get out ASAP!

Seriously though, can you imagine?

Police are saying no foul play, no carbon monoxide, everything's isolated ... nothing to see here, move along. Sure, three people just decided to peacefully decompose together in a Connecticut mansion.

Marchion has asked the court to hit pause on the closing until the investigation wraps up, and I can't blame the man. Nothing says "future equity" quite like wondering whose final resting place you just purchased.

Welp, congrats, Marchions, you got a brand new home and some brand new friends that will wait until approximately 4 a.m. to greet you!

I'll leave the local news report here for ya: