Hold onto your hats: Iran has reached a whole new level of desperation. And by "desperation," I mean "bomb-carrying suicide dolphins."
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Yes, you heard right. Dr. Evil would be proud.
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Not quite, but close.
From the Wall Street Journal:
Iranian officials said Tehran could use previously unused weapons to attack U.S. warships, from submarines to mine-carrying dolphins. The Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps has threatened to step up escalation by cutting phone cables in the Strait of Hormuz, which would disrupt internet traffic globally.
Mine-carrying dolphins.
Who would've guessed that the dolphins would end up on the side of the Iranians?
Additional reporting from the New York Post, pods of killer mercenary dolphins are no strangers to working for the ayatollah's regime:
It wouldn't be the first time the regime has considered deploying kamikaze dolphins.
Iran bought dolphins trained to kill for the Soviet navy in 2000, the BBC reported at the time.
The animals were trained to attack the Islamic Republic's enemies with harpoons attached to their backs, the outlet reported.
They were also trained to undertake kamikaze strikes against enemy ships by carrying mines.
You just know President Trump isn't going to be happy when he hears about this. He'll hit the dolphins with everything he's got in retaliation. Sanctions, tariffs, airstrikes — nothing will be off the table.
Brace yourselves…
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God help us.
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